Thursday - Day 11

Morning Number: 107

Even with Rice Krispy Treats!

Meltdown

I am having a small academic meltdown today. I have put off too many things for class. Now faced with multiple deadlines tomorrow I realized I don't understand some things as well as I thought I did. I am home today trying to sort things out and writing at least one short paper due tomorrow in Irish Art, a one page analysis of readings plus a presentation with questions for Pompeii. Merle leaves today for Montgomery. I will have a quiet week to try to get caught up and hopefully stay that way.

I need ...

Thursday - Day 4

Morning Number: 114

It's all about the numbers.

Well, my reevaluation is still in process. Trying to do to much always gets me in trouble. I am still eating breakfast ...that is good. I have started testing again in the morning. The new dose of Actos should be kicking in since I have been on it several weeks. I can tell by my bloated weight gain. Pants are tight, etc. {Sighs} I am going to focus on my morning numbers and try to bring them down to normal. Shouldn't be a problem if I get on a good diet (not rice krispy treats). So I am going to chronicle my numbers here every morning. That should hold me somewhat accountable. After I do this for two weeks, then I will start posting what kind of exercise (movement) I am doing each day.

PS: My number for today is 111. I am shooting for 90.

Golden Key

Sandra, congratulations
on your academic
achievements at
George Mason University!

Dear Sandra,

Because you've placed in the top 15% of your class, you are invited to join the world's premier collegiate honor society and begin enjoying a host of outstanding member benefits and privileges.

Sincerely,

Donna M. Fox, Ph.D
Associate Dean, Office for Academic Integrity
George Mason University
Golden Key International Honour Society

Induction Ceremony Information:
Date -- November 17, 2008
Time -- 3:00pm
Location -- Dewberry Hall of the Johnson Center

Smudge

Traffic was terrible this morning. Our 7:00 am bus arrived on campus at 8:30 am. I read most of the way -- The Volcano Lover, I have to give a book report next week. I had started the ride in the semi-dark with the reading light on. By the time we were on the Fairfax County Parkway the sun was shining and there were white clouds piling up in the crisp blue sky. That is when I saw the first one. A rainbow smudge-- peaking out from a tear in the clouds. Not an arch ...a smudge. It was like a secret wanting to be seen. Looking to the right of the sun, there was another one. It made me smile. No one on the bus had seen -- they were too busy napping, listening to music or reading. The smudges made the long trip seem inconsequential. I started my day with a smile and a haunting of rainbows!

Reality -- 2011

I have been looking at my bankbook, bills, the economy, Spring Schedule of Classes and reality has set in. Even though I really would like to graduate Spring 2010 it just isn't going to happen. To be able to stay on schedule I would have to come up with almost $1000 after Christmas to take 1 extra class. Then another $1000 for a summer class. Next year my expenditures after my 6 credit waiver would be $1300 each semester because of lab classes. Unfortunately my wallet just can't afford it. With the losses we have taken in our retirement during this economic crisis and with the economic outlook for the next year, I can't afford to put it on credit. The Spring Schedule isn't stellar so I am in a quandary on what I will take. I dropped my minor in Ancient Mediterranean Art and Architecture, that will make things a little easier. So I guess I will stick with my original plan -- graduate 2011. I should be able to take the summer's off and Mason will pick up most of the bill.

Time

It is time to reevaluate things. I have had to increase my Actos because of the steroid inhaler. Meds are now running about $150-$200 a month. Not exactly what I had in mind for this year. I am trying to figure out how to get everything taken/done in a day. It seems like evenings are a waste because I am just tired. I have started going to bed no later than 10:00 pm. I am trying to plan my evenings better. This week I have worked out evening meals ahead of time so I know what I am going to fix. I want to be able to use my wiifit or do yoga for 30 minutes in the evening and read for at least 30 minutes. I find it is taking me all weekend to just read my assignments because I am crashing during the week. Not a good thing when I need to start writing papers on the weekend...and I would like to have a life too (c: It would be nice to be able to do one thing every evening in the house. It would keep me from feeling like such a failure at keeping house. Work is overwhelming at times ... I find that lunch time is more of an escape than time to study...same with the bus time. On a positive note, I have started eating breakfast again which makes me feel better. I want some creative time too -- where will that fit in? An hour a week is not too much to ask for. I want to make abominal snowmen for Jenny this week. I have collected all the materials, so now it is just a matter of timeing. I also want to go to the Renissance Fair next weekend. Life is too short, there is just not enough time. So it is Monday ... I will see how things are going on Wednesday.

In response to my rant of September 20

I now have a bouquet of roses on my clean dining room table.

Blow

Sometimes I am blown away by things. Recently I have been blown off by a friend. I have glossed over it by telling myself that there is a lot going on in her life, and I really should not be upset about it. But, my feelings are hurt. I have tried to be supportive and understanding over the past few years. I guess it is because I too have felt overwhelmed. I ask her for help -- and it was a win/win scenario for both of us. Unfortunately, things did not work out completely. So I will just wait to hear from her when she surfaces again. I will not put myself out there again.